We Are Not F***ing Elderly

A chapter from my book, "You Are OK, BOOMER"

When I read in the paper about an older individual injured or in the news in some other way, the headline usually reads “elderly” person. Then there’s a word of some calamity that befell them or some difficult situation involving them.

I have often joked that if I were to get hit on a street near our house and sent to the hospital, the headline would read “Elderly Woman Injured in Accident.” Would the following story detail that the woman (me) was coming from the gym where she lifts weights and is then off to run errands? Later she’ll go home to work on her book or work in her yard. After that she’ll go out to party with friends.

 No, damn it, that label will seem to say it all. This poor, weak, defenseless little creature; this “elderly” woman. Well, this “elderly woman” would like to kick someone’s butt every time she sees that in a headline. Would “senior citizen” be better? A little, but it would take more letters. Or maybe there could be no reference at all to the age in the headline. If I get hit and you want to be accurate, just say “woman hit by car and in hospital.” In the article you can include my age if you want to be accurate, say that I was coming from the gym. My husband might add that I was working on upping my reps or weights or something to indicate more about me than my age group.

        We now have many ways to describe peoples’ gender or sexual orientation, but just one if you’re over 60. I respect and encourage all this diversity in labels, so could we please stretch it to something beyond “elderly?” OK, when I’m 90 and coming from the gym and get hit by a car, it might be acceptable to call me elderly, or by then, maybe there will be some more enlightened labeling.

I’m not alone in my annoyance. Friends and colleagues my age are busy, productive people. Even those who have various health issues do not want to be viewed as weak, doddering, “elderly” people. They hike, care for their grandchildren, make art, volunteer and fight for worthy causes. 

In this limited way of framing older people, even my ire might be framed as the response of a “crotchety” old woman. No, I’m not crotchety or kind of cute in my anger. I’m justifiably irritated by this practice that is a part of a trend to devalue those who are older. Perhaps as we baby boomers are no longer the demographic majority, our value has become diminished and thus the respect we are shown in this context.

         It’s notable that we don’t read, “Elderly CEO”, “Elderly movie producer,” or “Elderly research scientist.” Each of these descriptions carries a label of power or competence. That suggests another element in what is conveyed by the label of “elderly.”

I am not weak and fragile or whatever is conveyed by that label. Nor are most people my age. Dear journalists and headline writers, please look for a more accurate label and stretch past the “unconscious bias” that is reflected in that word. Find a more accurate label, if you need one at all.